Saturday, December 19, 2009

Attempt 2...

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 2.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Logo Design

Hello David,

I would like to catch up as I am working on a really exciting project at the moment and need a logo designed. Basically something representing peer to peer networking. I have to have something to show prospective clients this week so would you be able to pull something together in the next few days? I will also need a couple of pie charts done for a 1 page website. If deal goes ahead there will be some good money in it for you.

Simon

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 3.52pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon,

Disregarding the fact that you have still not paid me for work I completed earlier this year despite several assertions that you would do so, I would be delighted to spend my free time creating logos and pie charts for you based on further vague promises of future possible payment. Please find attached pie chart as requested and let me know of any changes required.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 4.11pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Logo Design

Is that supposed to be a fucking joke? I told you the previous projects did not go ahead. I invested a lot more time and energy in those projects than you did. If you put as much energy into the projects as you do being a dickhead you would be a lot more successful.

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 5.27pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon,

You are correct and I apologise. Your last project was actually both commercially viable and original. Unfortunately the part that was commercially viable was not original, and the part that was original was not commercially viable.

I would no doubt find your ideas more ‘cutting edge’ and original if I had traveled forward in time from the 1950’s but as it stands, your ideas for technology based projects that have already been put into application by other people several years before you thought of them fail to generate the enthusiasm they possibly deserve. Having said that though, if I had traveled forward in time, my time machine would probably put your peer to peer networking technology to shame as not only would it have commercial viability, but also an awesome logo and accompanying pie charts.

Regardless, I have, as requested, attached a logo that represents not only the peer to peer networking project you are currently working on, but working with you in general.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 11.07am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

You just crossed the line. You have no idea about the potential this project has. The technology allows users to network peer to peer, add contacts, share information and is potentially worth many millions of dollars and your short sightedness just cost you any chance of being involved.

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 1.36pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon,

So you have invented Twitter. Congratulations. This is where that time machine would definitely have come in quite handy.

When I was about twelve, I read that time slows down when approaching the speed of light so I constructed a time machine by securing my father’s portable generator to the back of my mini-bike with rope and attaching the drive belt to the back wheel. Unfortunately, instead of traveling through time and finding myself in the future, I traveled about fifty metres along the footpath at 200mph before finding myself in a bush. When asked by the nurse filling out the hospital accident report “Cause of accident?” I stated ‘time travel attempt’ but she wrote down ’stupidity’.

If I did have a working time machine, the first thing I would do is go back four days and tell myself to read the warning on the hair removal cream packaging where it recommends not using on sensitive areas. I would then travel several months back to warn myself against agreeing to do copious amounts of design work for an old man wielding the business plan equivalent of a retarded child poking itself in the eye with a spoon, before finally traveling back to 1982 and explaining to myself the long term photographic repercussions of going to the hairdresser and asking for a haircut exactly like Simon LeBon’s the day before a large family gathering.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 3.29pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

You really are a fucking idiot and have no idea what you are talking about. The project I am working on will be more successful than twitter within a year. When I sell the project for 40 million dollars I will ignore any emails from you begging to be a part of it and will send you a postcard from my yaght. Ciao.

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 3.58pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.10pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Anyone else would be able to see the opportunity I am presenting but not you. You have to be a fucking smart arse about it. All I was asking for was a logo and a few pie charts which would have taken you a few fucking hours.

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.25pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Dear Simon

Actually, you were asking me to design a logotype which would have taken me a few hours and fifteen years experience. For free. With pie charts. Usually when people don’t ask me to design them a logo, pie charts or website, I, in return, do not ask them to paint my apartment, drive me to the airport, represent me in court or whatever it is they do for a living. Unfortunately though, as your business model consists entirely of “Facebook is cool, I am going to make a website just like that”, this non exchange of free services has no foundation as you offer nothing of which I wont ask for.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.43pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

What the fuck is your point? Are you going to do the logo and charts for me or not?

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.02pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.13pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Do not ever email me again.

From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.19pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Ok. Good luck with your project. If you need anything let me know.

Regards, David.

From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.27pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design

Get fucked.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Best Birthday Song ever.. i mean EVER.

To celebrate another year of getting old, I wish someone would serenade me like this....



I like it when he says: "Let's celebrate" and hypnotizes us with his swaying arms.. so heart warming.

On another note, best bday mms of the year goes to D.Chacko:













I heart friends and family <3 Thanks y'all ^____^"

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

The New Fitness Trend

July 17, 2009 - Breakfast @ ihop Downtown LA



Yoga? - old school. Pilates? -  for losers.. Miss Em tells us how to really get fit.

"Just up in the gym just working on my fitness.. Kabbal-licious.. "

Friday, November 20, 2009

What everyone wants.. a Chola Makeover



George Lopez: What about the eyebrows?
Baby Smiley : You gotta make them hella dark, make them scream "bitch".
George Lopez: Why do they use sharpie?
Baby Smiley: Because.. if its raining outside you don't want them to wash off..

If I ever get this big.. please shoot me.

Holy Schmokes. She's trying to fly away.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Lotus' Killed God's People According to Ewok

July 17, 2009 - Breakfast @ IHOP downtown LA

So we were eating breakfast @ ihop where Jesse the Mexicana waiter served us and came upon the subject of tattoos. I was talking how I wanted a lotus tatoo.. (or was it Tree?), anyways, Ewok scared me into never getting a lotus tattoo..




What I was talking about:


What Ewok THOUGHT was talking about:


Two very very very very different things......

Monday, November 16, 2009

A Taste of LA Driving, July 17 2009

So, here's a taste of what it was like driving in LA. It was basically Miss Em driving while I navigate and the two bums in the back sleep until we reach our destination.



Ewok woke up to see what we were laughing about. We told her we had saw an animal, a hairy beast like thing running across the freeway making strange noises~ hahahaha

Sunday, November 15, 2009

I want cupcake!

Can I have cupcake please?

  WHAHAHA.. the website has started.......

MMS sent by ewok

Nobody Nobody but Chu

Phone Conversation on Friday Nov 13, 2009 8:30ish pm:

ichibum: Are you tucking in your daughter?
ewok: Gross! hells no! I'm tucking in her dad
ichibum: WHAT?!?! HAHAHAHHA you're tucking in her dad?!
ewok: yea? so what?
ichibum: BWHAHAHA, you are TUCKING in her Dad?!
ewok: NONONO! TALKING, i'm TALKING to her Dad!!

Sometime later in the convo...



ichibum: OMG. That link you sent me of that boy dancing to Wondergirls.. that was disturbing! Disturbingly good! Haha
ewok: What kind of parents are willing to let their kid become gay?!!?
ichibum: why does he have to wear his straps like that?! why?! BWHAHAHAHAHA
  
Click and be amazed by this kids talent, charm, and charisma...